China & Fig Leaves

I’m still jetlagged but I kind of like it, it’s awesome waking up super early not feeling tired at all. Mostly cause I’m aching for more time alone to recharge my spiritual batteries, and dawn is a special time when the heavens seem to pour down more purifying grace than any other time of the day.

This morning I asked God to begin revealing to me why He brought me here. Last night we were sharing at dinner why we came to China, and I gave a shallow answer that it was cause it would force me to speak Chinese, since I’m too embarrassed to practice at home. It’s true, I want to be able to converse with my grandparents, so that I can share the gospel with them. That was my reasoning, but there’s always been an inkling/call that God has His purposes for me here that go beyond the practicality of just learning Chinese so I can share the gospel in the language. These purposes are still hazy, but He’s unraveling them to me slowly as He is His heart for Beijing..

Today we visited Tiananmen Square and Forbidden City. Seeing the huge painting of Mao in front of the square, listening to the tour guide spilling out stories and ludicrous traditions that made up Chinese history, I was struck by the sheer weight of bondage upon the land. It’s a country plagued by idolatry, dishonesty, sexual immorality, etc. etc. and I walked through the entrance of the Forbidden City breaking down all these strongholds in Jesus’ mighty name. Yet I hardly knew how to pray for such a deep history ground roots-deep in a variety of biblically forbidden sins. These principles are what China has founded itself upon—competing to be the best and being thoughtlessly willing to cheat and lie to save face, submitting mindlessly to honored leaders, upping traditions of polygamy to unseen levels to fit an imperial crown, I don’t even know half of it. But in looking into China’s history and actually being here to see the effects, I know for certain it’s a nation needing to be freed from the gripping bondages of sin past and the lies present. There are so many people, soooo many here it’s crazy, who are captives needing a life-giving whisper from a loving God.

Walking around on Bei Da’s campus, it’s a heartbreaking shame to know that millions of people would shed blood and tears to be able to walk on the same ground I am. “Bei Da”—the name doesn’t sound quite as loud gongs of prestige and honor to you and me as it does here. It’s the #1 school in the whole country, where everything's about competition..Chinese kids would kill for a spot here, and their parents would kill them if they couldn’t get here.

Which makes me more and more persuaded that it’s all about shame here. A pastor at Bethel spoke to a group of Asians and people with a heart for Asia a message that is coming more and more alive in truth now that I’m amongst the Chinese people. It was about “Christian fig leaves", the things we use to cover up our shame, whether it’s dropping the name of our school to get a “wow” or saying “I’m fine” when all you want is some prayer and an ear, what have you. He said, “If you know that every single person in China has to deal with shame, you know exactly how to reveal the Father to them. They’re all covered in fig leaves.” The gospel, he says, is speaking someone’s identity over them over and over until they break. There is so much ground to break here, over the nation and over individuals—their hearts are cemented in shame.