Back-home Randomness

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Shortest trip I ever took overseas, but it feels weird being back. I saw how my grandma lived..she sleeps a lot more. She tries to talk to all the old people in the apartment complex, but they're not really responsive to her. Now that I'm gone, she's back to passing the days alone. I can't imagine losing a spouse. That's why God says take care of the widows. I had a wild musing, out of desperation for her salvation, that I should pull a Ruth and move to be with my grandma everyday. I think I'd go crazy though. We couldn't sleep before my flight. Last days are always difficult. I couldn't tell her how I really feel, how God feels, couldn't get the words out. Pushed by heaven, pulled back by hell..One of the greatest internal struggles man experiences under heaven. Mission unaccomplished. But I went with hardly a mission. At least there's the phone. She thinks Christians throw people away, weird. Gotta remember to pray for her regularly over here. Gotta remember that there's people who watch the time and wait for the day to end so a new one can begin, quietly hoping something will be different. There's a lot to face back home..but I don't wanna get caught up with life and forget about people. I need to commit myself to praying for people overseas. Some people are around, some beloved aren't..but doesn't mean they should be out of mind, out of prayers. I don't know what their life looks like anymore, but I know they have needs. I'm sleepy, but feel like there's a lot to do. /String ended.

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