Guard Thy Heart, Young'n

Excuse my deteriorating English and ability to use words to piece together thoughts, but hello again :) I just got back this morning from a trip to Xi'an, beautiful city.

Whenever I go with my study abroad group places, a bunch of Chinese people stare at them like they’ve never seen white people before. Some attempt to take pictures secretly, some run up and ask to take pictures with them. It’s pretty interesting how people can find each other so intriguing. I read a quote recently that said there’s nothing more fascinating than the human face. There is so much of the beauty of God in the mere reflection of people’s eyes and the curve of one’s smile, and these features are universal yet singly unique across the human race; indeed, God used His own image to make every person.

I’m currently piecing together the person of Jesus in my life. A good brother blessed me with a lesson from Packer that we should not imagine what G0d physically looks like because it would be so limiting and deceiving if not biblically guided. But my heart has been so easily losing focus off its rightful owner that I’m finding it necessary to imagine.. Not necessarily what Jesus looks like, but just trying to garner a more tangible experience of Him.

In this increasingly awkward period of Christian living of waiting for that one dude you’re supposed to marry, I proceed to arm, fail, and get up again, to guard my heart. One thing I committed to was to not even consider the possibility that a person might be “the One” unless God clearly shows me. That one was/is pretty difficult.

My recent commitment is to take these heart pieces I want to give away, and direct them instead to the love of Christ which is so much more pure and powerful. A glance there, an expression of genuine interest here, a smile and laugh I am the more contented to instigate, I take it all in and—nope, not to the heart, young girl—I commit instead to lay them down, to piece them all into the puzzle that is the love of Christ. By this, I mean taking these instances, and instead of giving in to temptation to hit the “replay” button upon the mind’s vast expanse, to replace that person with Jesus Christ, as if the gesture were coming from Him (I mean, He is the creator of love.) Plus if Jesus were here, He'd be doing all those things. :) And His love pwns any other's.

Yes, it takes much effort not to cling on to those heart-melting instances, and instead to lay them down to better comprehend and consume the bigger picture of “True Love.” But greater love has no one than this: that he lay down his life for his friends, or for the girl he was interested in. :) If Jesus were another brother in ICA or a guy in your class, He’d be throwing you glances left and right, laughing at all your jokes, and taking every opportunity to talk to you, cause He’s crazy about you. And it’s not "infatuation" cause He’s incapable of love tainted by sin. His love is true. His love is better. His love is greater. And the best thing is, He's the most beautiful, most quality guy there is. May every heart-stealing moment instead strengthen our conception of the love of Christ all the more.

**Note to self (and readers): You can't be with someone who tears you apart by making you even more insecure with your flaws and shortcomings. Your one should give you peace..